At age 26, Adam Khoo became one of youngest millionaires in Singapore...
At age 26, Stephen Chow debuted in his first feature film as a main supporting role and won the best supporting actor in golden horse award...
At age 26, David Beckham captained England into the world cup and scored a winning goal against Argentina in the group stages. He became the highest paid footballer at his time and even had the best season in his career scoring 16 goals in 42 games...
At age 26, James Wan directed his first feature film, SAW...
At age 26, my parents got married and not long after I was born....
Why am I mentioning all these? Because they are my inspiration and to a certain extent, people that I admire. Adam Khoo represented wealth, Stephen chow represented acting, Beckham represented pride and glory, James represented directing and my parents represented their commitment to love and family... turning 27 recently, I have yet to achieved anything like them...
I feel very sianz these past few weeks...felt so empty and lost and a sense of anxiety... sometimes I will be staring into blank space for 30mins..It has been a thinking period for me. Will be standing at a crossroad soon. Felt exhausted, and therefore I took a lot of naps these period to stop thinking...
The only time I feel alive and excited is during acting class. It will coming to an end soon in 3 weeks time. Then we have to wait 1 year to take lvl 3 for another 10 lesson. It has been a fun experience so far and sometimes I felt like I'm in Taiwan variety show. There were so many moments of awkwardness and we just burst into laughter=D How I wished poly days were like that... Since I did Lex Talionis, I felt that my acting has improved to another level. But it has been stagnant till I joined the acting class. I'm proud to say I certainly feel my acting has improved further and practicing all the fundamentals of character breakdown for my audition has been my habit now.
I passed my FTT with full marks (yeah!) so after graduating I will be going full speed for my practical lessons and perhaps looking for a temp part time job. Then after getting my license I will be doing my personal short film. Hopefully at least 2. Hopefully by then will be attending lvl 3 acting. That is the plan.
Why anxiety? Because I have recently been very tempted to join this org/co that offers high salary almost 2 times of what I am getting previously and the opportunity to travel around the world. Sounds good? The concern is just that I might not be able to have the opportunity to act anymore. Or at least for 2 years. Kept feeling as though time is running fast away… Kept asking myself, is this what I really want to do? I am really not sure… Keep me in prayer. I know, He will surely show me the way
Completely no idea why am I thinking so far ahead. I was reminded to just enjoy this period while waiting for my breakthrough... I'm glad although my progress is slow as least its happening compare to last year. And the irony is that its happening at a period that I'm resting or having a break. I just felt that the message of theme of the year always speak to me, almost like God is talking to me.
Year 2012 - Year of unceasing fruitfulness, indeed it was a fruitful year that I got to direct and act for Lex Talionis. Then I got to produced 2 more short film and acted for another 1 all for local competition and won small achievement:) Next was being involved in ABTM and got to attend a scripting class. All these despite my busy schedule at work.
Year 2013 - Key of David. Yes God shut the door that are no good to me and slowly lead me out of my co. I was put through many experiences that confirmed my decision. Being able to serve for outreach and mission trips. Joined church cg. All of sudden many open doors are before me such as joining my acting class with new found friends and many small acting opportunity.
Year 2014 - Year of Greater Glory. This year I have been put through many tough situation to build my character up. Sometimes the disappointment can be great yet at other times the fulfillment is indescribable. What I have learned is that never be too comfortable, keep pushing myself, see the supply flow from God. Jesus will see us through. I was reminded once again these are days of acceleration. How true, I can feel it. Jesus remove the sian-ness in me! And show me the way!
