A little update this year

Its been sometime since I posted something. Today is going to be a little update on my life. Yes beginning of the year I went for my final CC interview and as expected I did not get in. I went home with pride, held my head high and busy myself with more important things.

Casting was pretty decent got a few corporate and tv gigs. Got the opportunity to shoot and interview with 7-8 michellin chefs, about 1 chef a month/ This means I had about few hundred  dollars coming in very month.

In june I got to attend an award ceremony... just to share a little. I think it was in Oct last year that I chance upon this film competition. I went online to watched all the past entries in 2015, which was also the year that it started. So this year was its 2nd edition. The past entries many if not all, did not really wow me and the winning films did not even had any much of production value. I felt perhaps maybe because it was chinese language based platform and or the publicity was not done well enough. So i thought it would be great for me to take part.

Theme was "My Singapore Future". I had a strong urge to want to capture some of Singapore's old places and infusing it with Tsai Ming Liang style. Then I saw an ad done by LKS. Then everything started to make sense. Initially I pitch the story to my friend Kev. But somehow I felt he was just nodding and agreeing and saying "Lets do it!" for the sake of it and later on he will forgot about it and get busy again. So I borrow camera equipments from a friend because I had a wedding proposal to shoot and because I will be holding onto it for a month I think what was best for me was to shoot on my own for the worse case scenario.

I think not long after I chatted with Kev again and strangely this time he wanted to help me and even set a date for us to shoot which was very surprising to me. We had not shot anything for 4 years now. The concept was also simple and I thought if he pull out it was okie because I could handle on my own. If it flops it could well be my last short film as well as I was going broke. I guess Kev was free during that period and he decided to help.

Fast forward with all the work and effort put into our film, I started to have vision that I'm going to win many awards for this competition. No kidding... with all the prize money and splitting it with Kev I could possibly win 5-6k along and together over 10k of money. When all the entries was released I felt proud of our work because I knew I brought up the production quality and value to this year competition. Of course winning all the awards means winning best film (5k), most popular film (2k), best director (3k), most creative film (3k) and best actor (1k). The ones that I was really eyeing for was best actor and best director award, somehow I got feeling that most creative film was ours to take because none of the entries had such distinctive style like ours.

The result was we were nominated for most creative award and best film. We were runner-up for best film and won most creative film. We were not even nominated for best director, best actor and because we did not publicise our film on social media we were not in contention for most popular film.  A little disappointed on that but I was still so grateful that we won 2 awards and got $6k! I will released the film online early next year.

A month before the awards ceremony I was actually cast for a TVC. Here's a little about the casting process. I saw the casting call online and I applied to be a doctor in the tvc. There was a hospital scene and it needed a doctor role, the usual part where the doctor coming out of the theatre comforting the family members kind. It was probably brief scene and i thought this must be decent money for couple of hours of shoot. They called me up and ask if I wanted to go down for an audition and in my mind I was thinking, "huh this kinda role also need audition ah?". But heck I went for audition on sat morning.

The whole process was strange. I knew it was insurance ad but I didn't know the story. Did a few scene and in the back of my mind I was still thinking I'm a doctor or an executive. I knew there was 1 scene I was cooking in the hawker stall and another I was standing in my restuarant, proud of my achievement. I felt I didn't do very well, just average. A month later they called me and said I was selected to play the lead role. I was elated but acted calm. "Ya okie. let me know the shoot dates. I'm fine with rates. OK see u.bye". I wasn't overjoyed just happy because it means I had some more income coming in.

The shoot process was enjoyable. It is the ideal dream team. We had 2 directors from Philippines who flew in to direct the ad, we had the best gaffer in Singapore onboard, we had such professional art department team, we had wardrobe stylist that had worked on feature films before, and the make up artist, and the interns and everyone that was involved was great to work with. Even my co actors were so talented. And meeting the legendary chef was so awesome.

Initially when I'm done with the ad I though maybe its going to be online and I get the money and go. So far the response has been positively overwhelming. They had been spamming the ad on TV, online social media, youtube like crazy. It does gives me more recognition than I deserved. But I think it is still the entire team's credit. General audience would only see me and my co-actors who front the ad but I will always see the professionals behind this inspiring ad. Grateful for chef's investor that approved me, chef himself, the directors that believed that my average acting was well enough to front the ad and last but not least the insurance company that gave me this rare opportunity when I was broke, lost and confused about what I needed to do next in my life.

So suddenly I had more income coming in, I saved a little, gave my offering, went for church camp (perhaps my last because it was quite a disappointing one) and signed up for an acting course again.
Boy it was yet another eye opening experience for me. My class had so many people that had so much more exposure than me and there was so much to learn from them. 1 guy was the lead actor of a feature film, 2 guys took part in male pageant and 1 was overall champion and the other was 2nd runner up, we had 1 creative director. 1 host and couple of guys that had theatre experience.

I realised that Strasberg method wasn't really for me as it focus on sense memory. I don't really want to go back to the times I was heartbroken or sad and then show my vulnerable side to everyone when I'm working on a scene. I lean more on imagination and also because my life is pretty dull so there is really nothing much to tap on. So probably I will not take the intermediate class. I might take the writing class though. The biggest takeaway was the relaxation exercise as mentioned even by Ang Lee himself. The essence of all method acting is relaxation. When the mind is alert and the body is relax, emotions can flow easily.

At the end of the course we had to do a monologue. Half my coursemate  actually drop out of this showcase because of various reason. I too wanted to drop out because i wasn't doing up to expectations. But I had push many gigs away and spent too much time on my monologue to call it quit. So I did my first public showcase, to close to maybe 50 people. It was pretty scary 50 people judging you instantaneously and it is just you with no co actors.  It was so different from screen acting. Overall I think i did okie. perhaps 6.5-6.9/10. But I do feel that this experience definitely had push me to a greater level.

So that is my update so far. I'm still bit lost and confused if I'm heading to the right direction. If I'm even serving God's kingdom and glorifying or honouring Jesus with what I'm doing. In the world full of infinite choices, it is difficult to know what we want or if everything we do is the right way forward. Finances I'm way better than the past 2 years but I do not like to be comfortable. I want to push boundaries and step even further. Lord please show me your ways!

Being an Actor

Quote from David Ackert on being an actor

Actors are some of the most driven, courageous people on the face of the earth. They deal with more day-to-day rejection in one year than most people do in a lifetime. Every day, actors face the financial challenge of living a freelance lifestyle, the disrespect of people who think they should get real jobs, and their own fear that they'll never work again. Every day, they have to ignore the possibility that the vision they have dedicated their lives to is a pipe dream. With every role, they stretch themselves, emotionally and physically, risking criticism and judgment. With every passing year, many of them watch as the other people their age achieve the predictable milestones of normal life - the car, the family, the house, the nest egg. Why? Because actors are willing to give their entire lives to a moment - to that line, that laugh, that gesture, or that interpretation that will stir the audience's soul. Actors are beings who have tasted life's nectar in that crystal moment when they poured out their creative spirit and touched another's heart. In that instant, they were as close to magic, God, and perfection as anyone could ever be. And in their own hearts, they know that to dedicate oneself to that moment is worth a thousand lifetimes.